The Maddening Number of Signposts

Over the Easter long weekend, the traffic conditions have changed yet again at one of Croydon’s busiest intersections. From now on, the speed limit will be reduced from 80 km/h to 40km/h during school dropoff and pickup times. VicRoads know when they are being unreasonable. The dead giveaway is the overnumerous and comically large signage.

I’m not going to complain about the speed limit (however deserving). Today, I’m complaining about the architecture.

There is now so much signage that I can barely see the shops. The visual noise is making it difficult to distinguish important things such as tail lights and traffic signals.

Some of these signs can be misleading, contradictory, or incorrect. Collectively, they produce an utter scramble, and convey no useful information. There’s a couple of signs in particular that I find irksome.

Besides the meaningless up arrow to nowhere, there’s a massive sign to inform motorists about a road safety camera.

Fact: Road safety cameras DO NOT operate in this area. They haven’t for around 25 years. During the previous intersection “upgrade” about 5 years ago, I suggested to VicRoads that they could reduce visual clutter by removing the rusted shell of a decomissioned wet-film red light camera. They said “nah”, and erected this lie-on-a-post shortly after.

I would estimate that 9 in 10 signs could be removed. I don’t need a sign saying “stop here on red arrow”. I have a driver’s licence, and I know how red arrows work. I don’t care that a particular church is nearby. If I did, I can navigate from the street names. I don’t need to be told 15 times (actual number) in 30 seconds what the speed limit is. I got it the first time. Most of these signs state things that are so terribly obvious, I’m concerned those who need such guidance are allowed to drive at all.

Bonus: This pedestrian crossing is stupid.

As part of the major intersection upgrade 5 years ago, this pedestrian crossing got reprogrammed. It will no longer produce a walk signal as traffic exits Bellara Drive. Instead, it will halt the ENTIRE intersection, including traffic not crossing the pedestrian’s path.

Imagine this: It’s school pickup time, and the intersection is at saturation point. Schoolkids start flowing through the intersection in cars and on foot. This pedestrian button is pressed on almost every cycle between 3PM and 4PM. Everybody waits. Every car. Every direction. Every. Damn. Cycle.

This is not the corner of Flinders and Elizabeth. There is absolutely no need to do this. If the local hoons were ever observant enough to notice this, they would figure out that a button press can get exclusive access to the intersection for a 30-second demo. Complete with audience.